My Tribe, My Pride

They say it takes a village to raise a child. I say, it takes a pride. A pride of powerful lionesses.

Why a pride you ask? Sure, there are male lions in prides, but let’s be honest, the female lions run the show. Lionesses are strong and fast hunters, and are relentless until the kill is had. But, they are also very loving. In fact, lions are the most social of the big cats, and really take care of their families. Lions themselves are one of the most recognized symbols in human history.

It all started on Marco Polo. If you non- tech savvy people don’t know what it is, Marco Polo is an app where you can video chat, but not in real-time. So, you can record a message, send it, and your friends or loved ones can watch it, and reply at their leisure. It’s like video texting. Go download it! My sisters and our birth mom have a chat thread that is added to daily, and it’s a great way for us all to keep in touch. One of my sisters today mentioned  in our Marco Polo thread how each of us individually are so strong, but when we are all together, that we are like a lion pride, and an unstoppable force.

I have been thinking about it since then, and it really made me consider all the women who were and are in my life. They all have unique strengths and talents, and all have inspired me in my own life.

Obviously, I must start with my Mom. She gave my older brother, and my twin sister and I such a wonderful childhood. She adopted my sister and I, and loved us as unconditionally as if we were her own biological children. Our home was filled with so much love, opportunities,creativity, and freedom to be ourselves. She cooked amazing home cooked meals, and tried to be as involved with our lives as we would let her. Let me put it this way, I can literally count two hands the number of sports games, concerts, graduations, awards ceremonies, and any other events that she did not attend. Even when she was sick she tried her best to go. Besides her ability to be a mother, she was probably one of if not the smartest person I have ever met. I always told her to go on Jeopardy, because she would have won hands down. She read like two books a week, sometimes more, and always tried new hobbies and succeeded at them. She was truly an incredible, loving, selfless woman. Her example helped me so much in my journey into motherhood, even beyond the grave. My heart aches for her still everyday. Her friendship is a loss that is hard to fill. I literally called my Mom every day, and after she died, and even still today, I instinctively will want to call her with random questions or stories I have to tell her.

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My twin sister naturally, is a given member of my pride. She is my soul mate, and if that’s a weird thing to refer to your twin sister as, I don’t care. She and I have been through more together than I could ever write down. We have an unbreakable bond, and twin connection. Yes, for anyone who has ever wondered if twins really have a connection, WE DO.  She’s my person. (For any Grey’s Anatomy fans, you know what I’m talking about). I like to think that she and I loved each other so much in Heaven before we came down, that we begged to not be separated. So, we were sent down together. I honestly don’t think I could have survived this life without her with me. She has also been a second mom to my three children, and I know one day when she becomes a mother, her children will be as loved by me as my own are.

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To remind any readers who have forgotten, my twin sister and I are adopted. We recently found our birth mother a few years back, and also got to meet our three half sisters. My birth mom is an amazing woman, who has been through a tremendous journey in her life. She inspires me, as well as makes me so proud to have her blood in my veins. She and I met each other in person in the summer of 2013. It still amazes me the similarities we have, and that I also have with my sisters even though we were not raised together. Genes are a funny, funny thing.

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It was a marvelously emotional day when we met. So much, that I may need to write an entire post just on that. She is such a rock in my life now, and I am grateful that for the rest of our lives we can continue to strengthen our bond, and get to know one another. She is one of my best friends.

It was as if these missing pieces of my heart were now put back into place – that being my birth mom, my sisters.

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Since then, we have formed what I now like to refer to as our Lion Pride, thanks to my sister. Each member of our pride is different in our unique talents and abilities, but we have so much in common too that it’s pretty funny sometimes. None of us ever has to feel like we are alone in any situation. If one of us is in trouble, or just needs a good cry session, we never have to be afraid to be vulnerable and open up, because we are all there for one another. It’s the type of support system that everyone should have, and when I talk to them, and by chance get to be in the presence of all of them at once I am in awe. It just makes me so damn grateful and proud to be a woman.

When I found out my second child was a girl, I was beyond ecstatic. She is an irreplaceable addition to our family. Although she has shown her fiery personality quite early, it makes me so happy to have her in my life. If anything, her stubbornness and very strong opinions give me zero doubts that my daughter will ever grow up and be afraid to be herself. I also have zero doubts that she will be without female support throughout her life.  She is so lucky, because she has these five intelligent, capable, talented, and tough women to look up to. They will and have helped me raise her (even if they aren’t aware of their influence), and I would be proud if she turned out like any one of them. Just like I said, it doesn’t take a village to raise a child, it takes a pride.

 

xoxo,

Heather

The Raw Brunette

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